Confessions of a Mom of a Biter

Please see teacher for incident report. These six small words strike fear into the heart of daycare parents all over the country. In the majority of cases, it’s the instant quickening of the heart-beat, the “oh my god, what happened to my child” moment. In the minority, it’s parents like me who immediately jump to “oh god, who did my darling progeny bite or hit today?” This time, my child was the one who got bit. The irony is that she got a chunk taken out of her arm by a new girl. The new girl had just changed daycares because the mom was traumatized when her darling got bit at the old daycare (my daycare provider was almost gleeful that she got to tell the Mom that her child wasn’t as pure as driven snow). I of course was of the opinion that Avery probably deserved to get bit. And, in fact, after hearing the story, I still think Avery deserved the bite (she took a block away from the girl that bit her).

I’m the mom of a biter. The rest of you Mom’s hate me, because obviously I have no control over my child and don’t discipline her, otherwise she wouldn’t be a biter. To clarify, I’m actually the mom of two biters, one reformed, one current. The good news is, biters tend to stop biting when they become more verbal. The bad news is, sometimes it last for two years or more. My youngest, Avery, is almost 16 months old. She’s very active and aggressive. She’s the kid that takes toys from other kids, and it doesn’t matter to her if you’re twice her size. Once she gets what she wants in her sweaty fat hands, she’ll lay down on top of the item in question, and hold it hostage until you give up and go away. She also knows how to tackle, and can take down the bigger kids, in her attempt to rule the playroom. At home, I hear “Mom, Avery’s (insert here- hitting/biting/pulling hair), take her out of the room” at least twice every 10 minutes. At daycare, they tell me she’s much better than that, but then again, she’s been there long enough to have whipped the kids into submission. Her favorite words are “My” “No” and “Stop it.” In fact, “Stop it” was her first word, said with the hand held up in the universal stop or talk to the hand gesture. I find it really hard to lay down the law with this one, because she’s just too damn funny. I know she’s being manipulative, but I can’t help it. When you yell at her, she comes you and say “kiss.” How can you continue to yell at a kid who just wants to kiss you? And even then, she’s sneaky. She’ll be all kissy, and then when you least expect it, she’ll sneak in a bite, and laugh like crazy, and you know what? It is funny. She’s my last baby, and I’m going to give in to her.

Anaya's Birthday

Anaya turned four yesterday. A momentous occasion, because it means the hellish threes are finally in the past (the terrible twos are nowhere near as bad as the hellish threes). We had a family party, just the five of us, with a Tinkerbelle theme. Tinkerbelle movie, dolls, shirts and of course cake. Now, I put my husband in charge of the cake. Told him to go to Wal-Mart, order the cake, buttercreme frosting (not the nasty ass whipped topping crap), and make sure it's Tinkerbelle. So he does, and manages to even pick it up on time. But, in a very husbandly move, he's ordered a 1/2 sheet cake. It's like two feet by three feet worth of buttercreme goodness, but still, way too much for the five of us. Made worse by the fact that he's a freaking chef, and knows what a goddamn 1/2 sheet pan looks like. Such a guy move.

Bring on the Dems!

I'm a liberal liberal. My political leanings could be termed socialist. I am thrilled that Obama has been elected president of this nation (I missed out on John McCain's concession, as I was watching a TIVO'd episode of 3rd Rock From the Sun), and I think that he will do a great job. We gave the Republicans 8 years to screw up the economy, now the Democrats will fix it. The election of Obama will put us in a better position with the rest of the world as well (except for his fixation on Pakistan, I just don't understand that). Finally the land of opportunity has elected someone other than an rich white guy to the highest office in the land (though Obama is a rich half white guy, so maybe it's not so different after all?).

In local politics, Arizona wasn't so lucky. Prop 102 was supported by 56% of the voters, and will change the Constitution of the state to define marriage as only between one man and one woman. I don't know about you, but I think that this is just stupid. Why can't a woman marry another woman or a man marry another man? What's so wrong with letting people who love each other make a commitment to each other that is legally enforceable in the eyes of the law? It's just shortsighted and mean to exclude gay people from marriage.