Monday, April 27, 2009

Weekend Update

First off, we survived Adeline’s sleepover. All the kids, except for my own, were asleep at 11:00. Anaya, my 4 year old, was the last to fall asleep, and I had her Dad move her to her room when he got home from work. The girls did wake up at 5:30 in the morning though, which was not a thrill. I got up a 6:30, made them breakfast, which they didn’t eat, and let them go swimming. I just don’t understand how they could swim, because it was only about 70 degrees outside, and about that temperature in the pool.

Then on Saturday, my kids were crabby. Finally, after an exciting Red Sox game, I took them down to the neighborhood park. It turned out that half the neighborhood had the same idea, because there were probably five families there with their kids as well. The kids were all running around, screaming like banshees, as kids are wont to do in situations such as this. My youngest sat down with a boy about her age, and proceeded to put sand on his head. I picked her up, and moved her away from him. She picked up a bucket of sand, and whipped it at the kid’s head, missing him by barely an inch, and causing his father to remark on her pitching arm. I should probably mention that the mothers in the neighborhood don’t really know me, because I have the audacity to work, and not only that, I work at a job that’s not in healthcare or teaching. Therefore I miss out on all the little Mom’s Group meetings and all that. At some point, Anaya came over and got the sand toys out and started building a sand castle. Avery went to sit with her. Avery probably tried to help, but isn’t much of a help, in any situation. Anaya got mad, and yelled, across the playground “Mom, I will lose my shit if Avery knocks over my sandcastle again.” The Dad I was talking to started to laugh, the Moms in their little clique looked horrified. I just shut my eyes for a second, took a deep breath, tried not to laugh, and just moved on. Because that was totally my fault. That’s an expression that I use all the time, so they didn’t pick it up from anyone except for me. I am in so much trouble when Anaya starts school.

Sunday was boring. Didn’t leave the house except to play in the pool and the backyard. Watched the Sox complete the sweep of the Yankees. Fell more in love with Jacoby Ellsbury. Put the kids to bed, went to bed early myself, and that was the end of the weekend.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

I’m I Glutton for Punishment

I’ve agreed to allow my 6 year old to have a slumber party for her birthday. Argh! By this Friday, I’ll need to get the house clean, or at least cleaner than it is now. Order a cake, buy some junk food, and put together goodie bags. Since she turned 6, I told her she could have 6 girls from her class sleep over. I’ll put them in the guest den downstairs and I’ll crash in the guest bedroom. This way my younger daughters can actually sleep, and the noise from the slumber party will be contained in the front part of the house. I am not looking forward to this. I’m sort of stressed about it to tell you the truth. But, once this first one is over with, I’m sure it will just get easier. Plus the pool is open, so they can go swimming which will tire them out and burn off a bunch of time. If I can get four hours of sleep on Friday night, I’ll consider it a success.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

I Hate Ketchup

I hate ketchup. I hate the way it smells. I hate the way it looks. I really hate when it starts to get dried out and sticks to the top of the jar, or to a plate. In my opinion, there are only two acceptable uses for ketchup. First, you can use ketchup on scrambled eggs. Just a little, just as a dipping sauce. The second use is in conjunction with mustard on a hamburger or cheeseburger. Unfortunately, I have children. Said children believe ketchup should be used on everything. Hot dogs. Chicken. French fries. When they eat ketchup it gets everywhere. The whole table is covered with a thin film of the stuff. I then need to come through with a scouring pad and scrub it up. Not only that, but the flies love the stuff. We have a lot of flies in Arizona, and a lot in our house, since the kids don’t know how to shut the door behind them when they go outside.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

My Prom Dress

Yes, OK, Prom happened 13 years ago. I went with my darling husband, who was my boyfriend at the time (did I think it would last this long? truthfully no, not at that point in my life). But, if I was going this year, I would totally want to wear this dress:

Yes, its a vagina dress. Nothing says good, wholesome prom fun like a suggestive vagina dress! And, at only $99.99, you can buy it here:

I think the designer didn't have this in mind, but its totally how I'd wear it.